Rob Jenkins

“What a long, strange trip it’s been.”

As much as I hate the Grateful Dead and clichés, I felt like that was a pretty decent way to sum up how I got to where I am now.

I never thought that when I was a senior, I would be sports editor for The Appalachian – but that’s probably because I didn’t start out here.

It is an all-male school filled with old-money conservatives who hate everyone who is not like them. I got out of there as soon as I realized that.

I guess I am supposed to impart some of the knowledge that I have gained in college, so here is the first thing I will tell you: don’t ever go to Hampden-Sydney College. It is a sad, miserable place.

The second thing I will tell you is never join a fraternity or sorority. There are much better ways to spend your time.

I pledged Theta Chi Fraternity in my second semester at H-SC. Pledging was the most fun I never want to have again. I really loved my time in Theta Chi initially, but I soured on it quickly. You never really know the guys in the fraternity as well as you think you do.

But, joining a fraternity wasn’t all bad — I made two of my best friends. T-Rev and Perkins: thanks for everything. You guys helped me stay sane at Sydney.

After leaving H-SC, I took a semester off to work in the real world. Or at least the semi-real world. I lived with my sisters in Raleigh and worked at a manufacturing plant in Youngsville. I hated the work there, but it helped me get my head right.

Everyone should take some time off while you are in college. When you feel like you are just spinning your wheels and not going anywhere, take a semester off. It’s good for you. Ideally, you should take some time off before you even enter college, but whatever. Just give yourself a break at some point.

I transferred into Appalachian in May 2008. I moved into University Highlands and subleased a place with three football players. This brings me to my next nugget of wisdom: never live in University Highlands and never live with football players.

Highlands is ruled by fascists, and football players don’t make good roommates. They ruined several of my pots and pans, and I left with less silverware than I went there with.

After the summer with the footballers, I moved into a house with four other people, and we immediately embarked on one of the craziest years of my life. We threw wild parties every weekend: it was not unusual for 100-150 people to be at our place on a Friday or Saturday night. I’m not exaggerating.

I highly recommend living in a party house at some point in your college career. You meet lots of new people and you get a new surprise every weekend. Just lock up your stuff before the party: I caught someone trying to steal my Xbox at one of our shindigs.

The Appalachian hired me in August 2008, despite the fact that I had very limited journalistic experience at the time. Jon and Ashley: thanks for taking a chance on me. Joining The Appalachian is, without a doubt, one of the top three decisions I have ever made (the other two are trading in my Nintendo 64 for my first guitar and taking an internship in Montana after freshman year). It has been the most rewarding, stressful, enjoyable and hellacious experience of my life.

It’s funny, because I almost never even joined the paper. When I found out I was hired, my girlfriend at the time was coming to see me the same week as our workshops. In my youthful ignorance, I almost didn’t join the paper because I didn’t want to spend time away from my girlfriend.

Good thing I joined the paper, because I am still here, whereas she is long gone. On a related note, never date a girl from a women’s college because she might turn out to be a lesbian. Save yourself the heartache.

I guess the last thing I want to say is this: become good friends with at least one of your professors while you are here.

In my first semester at ASU, I met someone who has had a significant impact on me ever since: Dr. Tony Bly.

Dr. Bly taught my African-American History class. He is one of the most intelligent people I have ever been around. Over the last year and a half, Dr. Bly and I have developed a good friendship. He has helped me through a lot of tough times since I have been here. He has been my professor, band mate and confidant.

Dr. Bly — thanks. I wouldn’t be where I am without you.

OK I lied; I have one more thing to say. Enjoy your time here.

Since I opened with a cliché quote, I will close with one.

“Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

Jenkins, a graduating senior history major from Rocky Mount, is the sports editor.